Preparing for the Call

I received my call on July 17, 2013 to serve in the Russia Samara Mission

leaving for the MTC on December 4, 2013 to speak in the Russian language.

   I cannot convey to you the absolute excitement I felt opening that call. It felt like I had waited so long to receive it. I had Done so much and sacrificed significantly in order to have received my call.

   I spent a considerable amount of time waiting for the moment to turn in my papers with my parent's approval. They were NOT agreeable to the idea of me serving a mission, let alone in another country. Looking back now, it doesn't seem like much of an obstacle. But really, it was one of the hardest times in my life. I was struggling between doing what I new was right and following and respecting my parents.

   I think there were many factors of them being against my mission. Most reasons were very realistic- not enough money, too much of a risk, need to finish college, etcetera. I really did think at one time there was fear of the unknown. Everyone must face it at some point in their lives. Usually it is when a child "leaves the nest" and goes to college or joins the army or some other event significant enough to force childhood into a goodbye.
   I know that my dad, for the most part, was holding on. And the fear of doing something that did not follow the state quo of a "normal life" was unnerving.
   No doubt he still feels that way. I feel, even now off the mission, that I need another event that will help me break out of my childhood home. These times in our lives come naturally. You sense their approach and you can feel the excitement in the air you breathe when it comes near. They are special and precious times that we cannot let pass by. I have a theory (that hopefully will be proven in the near future) that those who let these opportunities of self-fulfillment pass by are more likely to feel more depressed, feel more regrets, and find their lives are not being lived for their own self improvement.
   I believe a degree of selfishness is required in order to better understand ourselves. We need to pay attention to who we are and what qualities we are made of. Pay attention to who we are becoming and make goals and plans to better ourselves. Ted R. Calister said in his talk The Fourth Missionary, "the greatest creation you will ever create is YOU."

   Tension still existed from a fight we had about me going on a mission. They made their point clear that serving a mission was out of the question. I went to the Bishop for guidance. They also went to my Bishop- to tell me to not go on a mission. So they invited the Bishop over to convince me not to go. I remember feeling so hurt that day. I knew what God had asked me to do, but no one was going to help me reach my goal.
    I felt confused for the longest time. Because I had thought I was choosing was the right thing, and I knew that my answer to go on a mission was from God. If this was was I was supposed to do, then why was it such a challenge to GO?

   I learned that God needed me to understand that even though he gave me a task, I had to follow through and prove that I would follow Him. The way wasn't going to have been made easy and clear once I decided to serve a mission. The Lord needed me to prove that I would do anything to obey His word. I needed to struggle to rely on Him. Because when I felt that no one was on my side, I was left to myself. Only when I was alone, did I find that I wasn't. He was there the whole time. He never wavered, never left me, and was trying to tell me that He would help me.

Like I said, my parents' hearts changed.

I was able to put my papers in on May 3, 2013 and then waited a lifetime to receive my call.
As stated before, I received it July 17, 2013. More than two months later! Which is literally unheard of in Utah. Usually prospective missionaries in Utah receive their calls within 2 weeks. the agony of waiting made me crazy.

  I knew that my call would change my life.
Because it is the place that I would remember every day leading up to and continuing through and after my mission. It was the key that told who I would meet and what culture I would come to cherish. I was certain that it was that one place (whether in or out of the United States) that would win my heart forever. Which was unnerving and exhilarating and these emotions practically left me breathless as I read my call.
I will never forget the initial shock from reading out loud. "Russia Samara Mission".